Jump to content


Photo

My turn to have a little rant... but


  • Please log in to reply
18 replies to this topic

#1 patch

patch

    OLD Big Cheese

  • Moderators
  • 5043 posts
  • LocationCentral New York
  • Bands:The Posers
    Ilion Civic Community Band

Posted 08 September 2013 - 08:21 PM

Here's my story or  my rant.  When I was kid or a beginner drummer all I had was sticks and a pad,  Till one day my grandmother invited me up to her house as she had something for me.  It was a snare drum.  I was so freaking excited, I had something to  use other then a block of wood with some rubber on it.  The drum was a very very crappy drum, sounded like crap, looked like crap.  But it was given to me and I cleaned it up gave it some loving care and made it work.  it was awesome.  

 

Now I wish to pave it forward and maybe make this a tradition and I have just the perfect person in mind.   My grandmother's son (My Uncle) has son  (my cousin) who has a son (what's that a cousin once removed) ---- did you follow that?  haah----  anyways he started learning how play drums last year.  So here I am, I have this old snare that I no longer use and as said  think that it would be really cool to pass on the gesture to the boy.  So I FB my cousin and ask if his son is still playing and is enjoying.  He writes back yes, so I tell him how our grandmother gave me his father's snare drum so even though I can't give that snare back as I no longer  have it, I do  have one I'd like to give to him.  My cousin is excited thanks me, tells me  how excited his son will be, but never comes and gets the drum. 

 

 This past weekend I'm invited to a birthday party for his sister's 1 year old baby.  I think great I'll be able to finally give this boy the snare.  we put it in the car and head out.  We get there, I see my cousin, I tell  him I have the snare drum, he says great looks for his son, he's off playing and I just hand the snare off to him.    Later on in the party, I see the boy and walk up to him and ask him if he's still playing is he having fun all that stuff.  He says yes and has a big smile on  his face.  I say cool.  Then there's a gift for you in the your dad's truck.  Eyes grow big..  I say I can tell you know what it is.  He says yea a drum set.  I smile back and say..  no, it's not a set, but it's a snare drum.  He says it's not a set of drums.  I said no it's just a snare,  he says, but I want a whole set.  I'm like well it's a start right, He said well I don't want just one, I want a set,  I said well it's more then what you have now correct and if you really don't want the snare just say so and i'll take it back home.  he then turned and ran.  

 

Before we left I told his father that I told him.  He's father said great did he say thank you.  I said no he was upset that I didn't give him an entire kit.  Father says what does he want.   I'm like a whole kit.  my cousin says I know but I want him to say thank you.  I just shrugged my shoulders as my ride was leaving, I had to go.   

 

 here's the thing...  I know I'm old and old school.  I'm not ashamed of that.  I also know or at least it feels that these days a beginning drummer is on the drumset from the very start unlike when I started where you had nothing but a drum pad, and wasn't till  I was in high school before I was allowed to move onto a set.  I guess I'm just like...  I get it, understand times change but where is the appreciation.  His family lives pay check to pay check.  They don't have the money to buy him a snare never minds a couple hundred dollar kit.  So why can't you just say Thank you and be happy.  Why do I have to feel like my gift wasn't good enough.  I'm glad I gave him the drum.  I still think it was the right thing to do.  just I wish I never talked to the kid..  I would have just gone home thinking he was as exited I was those many years ago...  but UGH!!!

 

sorry for the rant...  


Posted Image

VOTE NOW!
and GET YOUR I VOTED BADGE!


#2 mouse

mouse

    Dedicated Member

  • Members
  • 246 posts

Posted 08 September 2013 - 08:42 PM

Not a rant but a sad reflection of where society is now.  I want it all and I want it now.  I don't want to have to earn it I want someone to give it to me.

 

Hopefully his parents will talk to him and teach him the value of the things that matter, like being grateful for any gifts you get and the pleasure to be gained from working hard to get or achieve what you want in life.



#3 TrojanPhoenix

TrojanPhoenix

    Member

  • Members
  • 98 posts
  • LocationHouston, TX

Posted 08 September 2013 - 10:42 PM

Wow.

 

How old is this kid? 


"This is life

What a ****ed up thing we do

What a nightmare come true

Or a playground if we choose

…and I choose" 

 

"Make sure the soundman doesn't c***block the drums, let the snare knock the air right out of your lungs, and those words be the oxygen...just breathe"


#4 patch

patch

    OLD Big Cheese

  • Moderators
  • 5043 posts
  • LocationCentral New York
  • Bands:The Posers
    Ilion Civic Community Band

Posted 09 September 2013 - 04:21 AM

I believe he's in 6th grade. So that would make him about 11 or 12. Old enough to know how to appreciate something. I'm going fb my cousin In a couple of days if the kid is still that disappointed I'm going to offer to drive up to the house and pick the drum back up and bring it back home.

Posted Image

VOTE NOW!
and GET YOUR I VOTED BADGE!


#5 Ra Bones

Ra Bones

    OLD Guru

  • Members
  • 1320 posts
  • LocationCalifornia

Posted 10 September 2013 - 12:12 AM

Basic etiquette:  Be Polite.  Kids make mistakes, but he is old enough to understand basic politeness. 


"People only applaud when I stop drumming."
Posted Image
Jede Straße die hinausführt führt auch wieder rein.

#6 mouse

mouse

    Dedicated Member

  • Members
  • 246 posts

Posted 10 September 2013 - 07:42 PM

Any 11 or 12 year old that cant say "Please" and "Thank you"  needs a serious talking to.



#7 carox

carox

    OLD Big Cheese

  • Moderators
  • 5179 posts
  • LocationSouth West England

Posted 10 September 2013 - 08:04 PM

Lovely idea, Becky, and all credit to you for thinking of it.  But I think I wouild have given up at the point where your cousin didn't come over to pick up the snare like he said he would.  I don't think his behaviour at the party was all that good either - he could have made the effort to find his son when you spoke to him, or to bring him over to you at some point to thank you.

 

I know I can't really judge the people involved from your post, but my initial reaction was that it was your cousin that was lacking in the manners department.  And if that's the case, then there's not much hope for his son's manners.

 

Apologies if I've got it completely wrong. 

 

I can imagine how you feel though.  Not nice.


Posted Image

#8 patch

patch

    OLD Big Cheese

  • Moderators
  • 5043 posts
  • LocationCentral New York
  • Bands:The Posers
    Ilion Civic Community Band

Posted 11 September 2013 - 12:14 AM

I'm going to wait enough time for a thank you note to come in the mail and then I'm going to facebook  his father a message and tell him that if his son is still upset over receiving just a snare to let me know and  I'll be up to pick it back up and bring it back home.  


Posted Image

VOTE NOW!
and GET YOUR I VOTED BADGE!


#9 smallbutdeadly

smallbutdeadly

    OLD Regular

  • Members
  • 810 posts
  • LocationYorkshire UK
  • Bands:organized K-hos

Posted 11 September 2013 - 11:15 AM

Hi Patch,

I bet your feelings were hurt, I was upset for you just from reading that..

I was super lucky to be given my first set up ( you know the story)

Even though looking back it was old a bit broken down and didn't match, I LOVED it, and I still say thank you for starting me off to Shaun, who gave me it, and it is 6 years ago!

I am a bit embarrased to say, but  some kids, i have seen on fb/tv, who have an amazing kit, who can't really play!  I think I would LOVE to have that kit!! what is a kid just starting out doing on a kit like that?

but I am happy with mine, and the bits that may be old, and given to me, are special!

 

I hope you get the thank you, or if I were you I would ask for it back 

SBD

8)


thirteen year old drummer girl :D


#10 patch

patch

    OLD Big Cheese

  • Moderators
  • 5043 posts
  • LocationCentral New York
  • Bands:The Posers
    Ilion Civic Community Band

Posted 13 September 2013 - 01:20 PM

You just made my day SBD...  I'd say my "cousin"  (how ever that works..)  the kid is about the same age as you maybe  a little younger, but your reaction is what I expected.  It's what people should have.  I'm betting when you get older and buy a "new" kit... I'm betting at least some of the drums that were given to you, you keep because of the special meaning behind them.  

 

I did contact his dad and asked him if his son was still disappointed and if he was I will be up to pick the drum back up.  He wrote back.  No he's been extremely happy with it and has been playing every night.  Then the father said "one thing though.  I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS GOING TO BE THAT LOUD..., I'm going to have to buy I him those paint brush looking ones ,they seem quieter .. LOL"  I'm guessing he means sticks but that kinda makes up for the lack of excitement that day he received it.


Posted Image

VOTE NOW!
and GET YOUR I VOTED BADGE!